Alyssa is one of Amy's closest Stanford friends, from Montana (406 area code). She now lives in Washington, DC and works for a congresswoman in defense and politics. Amy called her "the best friend I have ever had."
Stanford
They reconnected in January 2022 when Amy reached out: "Hey Alyssa! This is Amy. Just wanted to lyk that I miss you." Alyssa was in Florence, Italy. Amy was at Apple.
By September 2022, both were back at Stanford. Alyssa was in Montana, moving herself on the 23rd. She'd "had friend break ups w a lot of ppl" and was "just a woman alone doing a mans job (moving)." She lived in "Narnia" (Stanford housing). They started hanging out: lunch at Narnia, painting in EBF field with wine, disco parties.
2023 was their peak year. 5,731 messages. They were inseparable: taking the train to SF together, going to cafes, constipation bonding ("i RAN to toilet"), movie nights (Barbie/Oppenheimer), dance events, visiting each other's places. Amy called her "the best friend I have ever had." They had trips together and planned Airbnbs.
Alyssa was part of a wider friend group: Sonja, Anika, Justine, Sylvia.
Who She Is
Alyssa is a natural storyteller who communicates in vivid, scene-setting dispatches. She doesn't just say "I saw a weird guy on campus" — she narrates: "Albert and I are in the same class / And he basically kissed me when he came up to me / Then he breathed in my mouth." Her texts read like the best parts of a personal essay.
She is completely open about her past: she had a nose job right after high school, disclosed sugar daddy relationships from her Stanford era ("basically prostitution what I was doing"), and talks about all of it in the same casual register she'd use for lunch plans. She is self-aware about her flaws ("I'll never be rich😞") and uses gossip as intimacy — information-sharing as bonding.
Dave is her recurring romantic obsession throughout 2023–2024. He is treated as alternately wonderful and maddening. "He's not Dave" is a line she uses to compare every other man. In early 2024: "I can't decide if we should break up or not / I feel stressed from my work and stuff and it just feels like another obligation." And yet: "He has a chokehold" on her.
She embodies a Montana-DC identity split: tough and outdoorsy enough to own a metal detector, but also doing LSAT prep and analyzing her coworkers' marriages.
Key Moments
January 2023 — The overnight stay: Alyssa's dorm doesn't open until Saturday, her flight comes in Friday at 10pm. She texts Amy sheepishly: "Is there any way I could stay w u for a night??" Amy says yes. Alyssa arrives at 11:04pm. She leaves the next morning with thanks and hearts. Small act of trust that cements everything.
January 2023 — The metal detector plan: They plan to ride a two-person bike around Stanford campus while using Alyssa's metal detector: "One person would peddle and the other would detect for metal / Maximum efficiency on a big campus."
February 2024 — The internalization quote: "I always think 'how would Amy say this' when I have to say something to a coworker or a crush / Thanks amy." This is probably the most revelatory moment in the friendship — Amy's directness has become Alyssa's internal compass. Amy shaped how Alyssa speaks to the world.
January 2024 — The Dwight date: Amy is about to go on a date with someone named "Dwight." Alyssa goes into protective mode: "If he's weird, go to bathroom and get Uber out of there." Then: "U won't die / Not at the hands of a man named Dwight 🤣 / U could take him."
Early 2024 — Depression disclosures: Alyssa at 4:30am: "I've been having wild deja vu all day / I think I'm really tired." Amy asks if she's really depressed. Alyssa: "Ugh r u fr depressed? :/ cuz I am." They hold each other lightly, acknowledging it without dwelling.
2025 — Antidepressants: Alyssa mentioned starting an antidepressant: "I started an antidepressant and I feel full of energy."
After Stanford
The friendship faded the way college friendships do when geography intervenes. Not through drama, just distance. Alyssa moved to DC and got a defense/government job. She told the group she was "stuck building missiles in Arkansas" (likely a contractor site visit).
The numbers tell the story: 5,731 messages in 2023, 2,788 in 2024, 156 in 2025, 16 in 2026. A clean decay curve with no inflection point, no fight, no falling out. Just two people in different cities with different rhythms.
Inside Jokes
- "You may know me as Star" — Alyssa once wanted to be called Star in middle school. Amy told her to introduce herself that way in Berlin. Referenced for months.
- Love Island — their shared watching ritual, Aimee and Wes discussed like mutual friends
- Dave — his name invoked as shorthand for unreachable romantic ideal ("He's not Dave")
- The two-person bike / metal detector — the recurring image of their friendship's most absurd planning
- "Bro needs a PhD in getting bitches" — her comment on her ex's academic performance relative to his relationship failures
- "son of a gun" — her signature mild profanity, used for spilled coffee and betrayals alike
Significance
10,902 messages total. January 2022 to 2026. Alyssa is the classic intense college friendship that burned brightest in 2023 — the year Amy also broke up with Diego Celis, turned down the Apple offer, and committed to what would become Taya. Alyssa was the person Amy was closest to during one of the biggest decision points of her life.
Amy's friendship with Maddie Wang eventually filled the role that Alyssa once held, but in a more durable form. Maddie lives in SF. Geography helps.
The February 2024 text — "I always think 'how would Amy say this'" — is the friendship's thesis statement. Amy left something permanent in Alyssa's voice.